Father, You said in Prov 13:12 that “Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a desire realized is a tree of life”! Our Heavenly Father is the God of hope! He wants our relationship with Him to be full of hopes and dreams that turn into reality so that it infuses us with more life and momentum. The enemy wants our hopes stolen leaving our heart sick and in bed, totally out of the game of life!
In any hope deferred situation, the enemy wants to block the dream/success (or what is hoped for) and then point the finger at us as the real problem and highlight any and all mistakes or wrong decisions we made that caused the failure! The enemy also works hard to lock us into the limited spiritual awareness of our outer man operating in survival mode (it often includes that “deer in the headlight” fear & trauma). When he gets us locked into this survival mode, he will throw more lies at us to imprison us there away from God in our own perceived failure, loss, and trauma!
When desires are not realized, the enemy also loves to attack God’s character and accuse Him as being the problem for not helping. The enemy attacks us with the lie based thought that “God could have helped and that He had the power to help, so obviously He didn’t care enough about us (or was upset at us) and therefore withdrew from us and left us in our failure and hope deferred.
When we have experienced this trapped place of failure, loss, and abandonment, the enemy inundates us with the following lie based beliefs: our worth and identity are rooted in our performance therefore we are shameful failures, the fear that God (as our Heavenly Father) does not have our backs, the belief we have to suck it up and survive on our own, the belief we have to ultimately rely on our own independent abilities, the belief that God does NOT really come to us in the times we need Him most, the belief that we can’t hear His voice, especially when it matters the most. All of these support the ultimate lie-based belief (empower by the experience of failure and loss) that we are really orphans rather than one of His children who He really cares about!!
When the enemy gets us to believe that we are (or deserve to be) real or functional orphans, a life of survival ensues. This orphan status is glad to upgrade to religious slavery that never gets beyond the truths of Lordship salvation and Lordship sanctification. The saved orphan easily settles for just being a servant that might get a “well done good and faithful servant” at the end of life! Luke 15:19 Therefore our position and identity as a son or daughter, as well as our birthrights (as children of the King), as well as our functional places as heirs in the Kingdom, as well as our friendship, partnership and abiding with our Father & King, are all forfeited! The enemy loves this tactic of killing, stealing, and destroying!
At this point we are stuck in time (in the middle of our failure) and set up for all the doubt & unbelief that goes with failure and feeling abandoned!! It is essential that we work through our hope deferred by taking it to Heavenly Father through prayer! This step gets us in a state of rest, until the breakthrough of “desire realized” manifests!
Questions to Find Hope Deferred
So let me ask, “what failures, or significant loss, or major disappointment comes to mind?” What was your most traumatic business failure or loss? What was your most traumatic personal failure or loss? What loved one died and you are not over the loss? You may have one or more of each! To a degree, part of you may still be stuck in one or more of them.
So what would make your top five list of hope deferred moments and situations?
Identifying these and writing them down is a great place to start.
Most of us have spent a lifetime of avoiding these places like the plague! So don’t be surprised if you want to avoid the questions above!
Why? Because these failures and lost hopes were so disappointing in our lives, most of us want to forget or ignore that they happened. It just hurts too much to think or dwell on them, and when we do, we end up beating up on ourselves again, or stirring up more bitterness & unforgivness toward those who betrayed and hurt us, or further distancing ourselves from God because we are reminded that He didn’t have our back then, and He probably won’t in the next hopeful situation. This is how hope deferred becomes a powerful hidden stronghold in our lives.
The enemy loves to inundate us with the lies and thinking: that we got ourselves into this mess, and we have to live with our consequences, or that God is indifferent, unengaged, upset with us, or punishing us for our poor performance in this situation, or punishing us for some sin or failure of the past. Then when we get in a similar situation (whether we are consciously aware of it or not) our self defense and survival mechanisms (buttons) kick in and we begin responding to the situation in the limitedness of our outer man (soul —mind, will, emotions, as well as our physical body’s avoidance, flight and fight modes).
So please spend some time intentionally drawing near to God as a son/daughter and ask Him to be with you in the process of finding your “hope deferred” situations! Please work through the questions above (and the prayer below) with Him and get His help to expose and reveal your areas of mistrust!
Holy Spirit will be right with you taking this area of your life back! He will really protect you and help you break into “desire realized” and move in new faith and trust in Christ with Heavenly Father as the son and daughter and heir you were created to be!
Prayer to Be Free of Hope Deferred
Father, in Jesus Name, I pray and ask that Your Kingdom comes near to me right now!
Father, as a son/daughter and being in Christ, I draw near to You in the complete safety of Your Throne Room! May I sit next to You in Christ, clothed in His righteousness and totally washed clean with His blood? Father will You restore me to the fullness of who You see me as (seated next to You as Your son/daughter)?
Father You see how my “hope deferred” has separated me from You in mistrust, discouragement, and feeling abandoned (like an orphan). Jesus promised He would not leave me this way (Jn 14:18) and explained that He would come to me and bring me to you! So, with His help, I draw near to You!
Father, will You heal me from all hope deferred, especially from the pain of past business failures, the hope deferred from all relational betrayal & loss as well as the pain of my personal failures & trauma?
Father You know that parts of me that are still stuck back in those failures, betrayal & traumas!! I still remember many of them like yesterday! (Note a situation that comes to mind and proceed.) _______________________________________________________________
Father, I know the truth that, “You never leave us nor forsake us”, would You show me where You were when I was in _________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________ (my failure/trauma)?
Would You show me where You were in the invisible realms of that situation? (Pause and let Him show you).
Father, Thank You that YOU WERE THERE WITH ME!
Father would You forgive me for my part of being stuck or trapped in this place, including every lie I have believed that has kept me there?
Father, Would You also forgive me for coping and surviving as best as I could in my own strength and determination?
Father would You now take me out of this place forever?
Father, would You raise me up and set me at Your right hand in Christ where I belong?
Father, will You put me in a process of total restoration in identity, legitimacy, and wholeness as Your beloved child sitting next to You abiding in Christ?
Father, now that I am sitting next to You, will You also heal me from the sickness and damage to my heart, spirit, and inner man that this hope deferred has caused?
Father this sickness (from hope deferred, failure, and loss) has also led to many of my strongholds of unbelief. It has created resistance in me to Your promptings to move in faith, as well as fortified my unwillingness to change.
Father, will You forgive me for my unbelief and every associated lie based mindset?
Father, will You also forgive me for every inner vow that I made (in my survival mode) trying to manage the loss and failure?
I confess that I moved over into my own strength using inner vows and often promised myself that I would never let those things happen again. Father, I did this without taking these burdens to You (and therefore I handled these failures by myself, absent of the abiding). Will You forgive me?
Father will You also heal me from the internal damage this caused to my heart, spirit, & inner man? They got crushed, shoved out of the way, and my outer man (operating out of fear and survival), took over and ran the show out of his/her own strength!
Father, Will You forgive me and restore me to the healthy dominion of my inner man’s leadership and abiding in You (and You in him)!!!
Father, may I now partner again with You in the awareness of unbroken abiding?
Father, May I move with You to restore what (failure and hope deferred) destroyed and held back?
May I move with You in unbroken abiding and partnership to advance “every good desire,” over into the “desire realized” category!!!
May these successes (and the associated fellowship with You), be a tree of life! May they bring great glory and advancement to Your Kingdom!!